Integrated Domestic Abuse Programme

The Integrated Domestic Abuse Programme (IDAP) is designed to challenge attitudes that have lead to violent and abusive behaviour against their partners.

Tony says ...

"We have been married for 16 years, and I suppose - in the early days - when I said something at home .... then it wasn't challenged. In more recent times we have had rows, and sometimes we would not speak to each other for two weeks. When you behave like that, nothing gets resolved.

"The night I got arrested I had been drinking. I had been in a bad mood, and my wife locked me out. I kicked in the door and started throwing things around in the kitchen. The children heard me and my wife got hurt when she came into the room.

"The programme helped me to open up about myself and what I was thinking. The tutors put up a list that described how some people behave. I could tick nearly all the boxes. One of the things was coming home and not talking about what had upset you at work. I would return to the family in the evening and say nothing to them. That was a bad way to treat my wife.

"I was the provider for the family and I guess I thought I didn't have to do anything else. I didn't have a relationship with my children - and I didn't realise it. I do now."